Dear Mr Dream Maker

Respected Sir,
I am writing to applaud you on the many wonderful years of fascinating dreams you have provided me with. I am also writing to express my thoughts on how you should be doing your job.
(Please note that all points are neatly arranged in sequential order, starting from the start and ending at the end. Very unlike what you are used to, but I sincerely hope you follow.)

1.
Inception-like dreams within dreams are strange and thankfully very rare. It is slightly disturbing to wake up from one dream and think 'Calm down! It was just a dream! Thank fuck!' and then see the same demon/exam/ayn rand book come back to haunt me for a few more seconds before I wake up again and think 'Just a dream. Just a dream within a dream. Can I calm down now or is there more?.'

2.
Enough with the college dreams. Please.
I lived through four years of that crap. It really isn't fun when I suddenly find myself in the middle of an examination trying to pen down my rather vague thoughts on some course I didn't know I was taking (Very realistic by the way. Well done!) with a limp, yellow, rather rubbery penguin in my hand.

3.
From my analysis on the way you end my almost-wet dreams, I assume you have a killer sense of humour. I'd suggest you curb that and stop waking me up at such ill-timed moments or I really will find a way to get to you and make you eat your own faces (I heard you have more than one head. Or did I spell that wrong? Well, that's for me to be unsure of and for you to find out soon enough if this happens again.)

4.
What is it with you and falling?
Off a cliff, Into a pool, Down a wormhole(okay, this one is fun once in a while!).
I wouldn't mind all of these so much if you gave me some sort of insurance. You know, a parachute, little red duck-beaked floats that go around my waist, a little book with big reassuring letters on the cover ... something ... anything at all! At least I won't wake up with a jolt so bad that I spend the entirety of the next morning limping all over the place.

5.
Morning wood. What the heck is that all about?
Some lingering details on the why's and the who's and the how many's would be very very welcome.

Now, onto some commendations.

1.
Good job on the techni-colour dreams. Beautiful shapes, tantalising colours, excellent stuff overall. Really. Well done.

2.
Adventures. Almost always wonderful. The only drawback to this is going back to a suddenly-mundane-in-comparison existence. Suggestions for future episodes : dragons, swords, pirate ships, certain familiar faces, and some fruit chews if you can manage them.

3.
Dream-less sleep. I know everyone is entitled to a night off once in a while. I just hope you feel as relaxed as I do on these nights.

I do hope this letter finds you in good spirits, better health and the best of moods.
Thanking you,
your sleepy friend from ever since I can remember.