From India, the google.co.in domain...
Let's do these one at a time, shall we...
1. Fame, fortune, pretty girls who like money, big cars, silk bathrobes, heated bathroom tiles, Poodles and pugs, Italian business suits, licence to flaunt a holier-than-thou attitude! Why wouldn't anyone want an MBA?
2. We aren't, stop flattering yourself.
3. You probably shouldn't. I'd just take your money and make you feel bad about yourself.
4. Aw, self pity! (or self-loathing? Oh wait, that's at number 5)
5. Aw, self loathing! We aren't ugly. You may be, but there are a lot of very beautiful people out there.
6. Do we really want to go there? Why analyse? Just be glad there are as many breasts in the world as there are people. Hurrah for breasts!
7. We are, aren't we? heh. It's a little weird actually, we seem to love to throw money around at things that aren't really deserving of it. Like over priced dinners at fancy restaurants, outrageously expensive movie tickets (not to mention other cinema related expenses. Popcorn for 100 Rupees? bleh), and yet we don't hesitate to haggle with the poor old vegetable lady down the street over a couple of rupees.
8. Not too sure about this one. I think it all starts with either peer pressure or the 'cool' tag that comes free with the little cancer sticks. Anyway, here's a fun thought. Have you ever thought about second-hand smoke? It's not just something that's passed on between active and passive smokers. It's particles of smoke that have travelled their way through another person's insides - nose, mouth, lungs, slimy, icky parts, and are now making their way through yours. (Non-smokers, make 'ugh' noises about here, smokers please feel free to go 'hah, it's like we're kissing!')
9. Same reason we're obsessed with foreigners, isn't it?
Saw a blonde, busty young firang 'lady' working at a bar yesterday. Getting a hell of a lot more attention than any of the other females in the vicinity. (Although, this might've had something to do with the fact that she really seemed to like bending low. Often. For lengthy periods of time. Sigh. Oh, blondie, won't you be mine!.)
10. Because life is so bloody depressing and there is nothing to live for? (or because you're sleepy?)
And now for the International...The google.com domain!
1. So that bullies at school can twist them and make you do whatever they want...okay, let's not go there.
2. Good god, why the heck do you care? Concentrate on more important things in life like...
3. Green poop! Man, foreigners are weird. It's probably from eating a leafy vegetable for the first time in your life, you animal hater!!!
4. Because they're happy and content with life and want you to know it so you can compare yourself with them and say 'Damn, I wish I was a cat. They have it so easy. I hate my life.' And then hopefully you'll blow your brains out and the cat will purr with (more) contentment and happiness.
5. Because your spouse couldn't get married alone (sorry, had to throw in at least one really terribly poor joke in here. Wouldn't feel right otherwise)
6. To gross you out so you would say 'Oh my god, my poor eyes!' and then hopefully you'll blow your brains out and the dog will meet up with the cat and have a good laugh at your expense and give each other belly rubs later.
7. ... (Damn, I could've stuck the poor joke in here).
8. To get the taste of the poop out of their mouths. (Only if the plan(see answer 6) doesn't work. When it does work, they prefer to use beer and toothpaste instead)
9. Ugh. Bathe, you dirty foreigners! Bathe! Use a bloody bucket instead of showering all the time. There are a few places an overhead shower will not reach!
10. Something bad happened on some friday, who cares?
Oh, here's my favourite!
